Tell me a story. ...

We all know someone who has clear commitment issues. I am that friend. I am the one on a prepaid cell plan, because I refuse to sign up for a couple years service. What if I don't like that carrier in a year? What if I want a new phone? I can't do a contract. I am the friend who has a significant other, because the term boyfriend just feels awkward for me. Lord help us if someone refers to him as my husband. 

Where does the allergy to commitment come from? Well, somewhere along the way someone destroyed trust. Someone on the path of life took security away and replaced it with the I'm not sure anymore attitude. Folks look at me crazy, because I have tattoos. Well, my tattoos aren't going to roll over one day and tell me they don't love me.

I am still bent. I'm not broken, because I am capable of trust and love. It's just a little harder to earn these days. I'm not afraid of love. In fact, that's the one addiction I have. Love conquers all right? It may not conquer all, but it heals better than time. 

I am not insecure. I am very comfortable in my skin. That doesn't mean I don't like to hear that I'm beautiful. I am quite confident in who I am. I've faced my demons, and I know my flaws. That doesn't exclude me from wanting to hear why I'm loved. I want to hear these things, because time changes everything. The reason you love me now may not be why you fell originally. The reasons you stay aren't the same as they were last year. Seasons changes. People change. Relationships evolves, and knowing why we're going to make it is an ever revolving door. Priorities, routines and habits all conform over time. 

Remind me why I'm worth it. Tell me about the good old days, and how they've gotten better. Tell me what I need to work on. What drives you crazy? What's irresistible? What turns you on? They say men need to be needed, but women need to be wanted. What makes you want me? 

When I look at the sig I see a handsome, charming, hilarious, sometimes selfish, sexy, romantic. I still get chills when he brushes his hands across my back as he passes by. My heart beats faster when he holds my hand, and my whole day melts away when he pulls me in for a deep embrace. No matter how I feel, I am ok when he holds me. 

On the flip side, I hear every time he doesn't say I love you. I feel the tension when he's upset with me, and it rips me to shreds. I don't sleep if he doesn't hold me. I miss him when he's not here, but after all this time I still smile when his name shows up on my phone. I often wonder what goes thru his mind when he thinks of me. 

Tell me a story.....you know the one where you fell in love with me. Remind me.  I want to hear the way your heart beat in your chest when I appeared. What was it about me that caught your attention?  You tell me yours,  and I'll tell you mine.